Let’s Talk About the ‘Silent Treatment’

By Oluwabusola Adedire

I remember my days of using the Blackberry messenger which shows the delivered and read icons, and even more recently Whatsapp, which shows the exact timing you were last active. If you use any of the above platforms in communication, then you will understand how annoying it is when someone fails to acknowledge your message when it is obvious it has been read. It is even worse you experience this social rejection in real life.

Imagine being in a relationship or talking with someone exclusively for some time and all of a sudden no goodbyes, no words…They just vanished into thin air. How do you even begin to comprehend it? How do you get closure? There is mystery in silence, as it could mean a thousand and one things.

The silent treatment is a phenomenon most people would have encountered at some point in their lifetime, and too often it is being treated with triviality. Silence is a very problematic way of communication which suggests distress tolerance and poor emotion regulation skills; it is also classified as a form of emotional abuse.

I did a little research and found out that silent treatment is highly manipulative, involves emotional game-playing which is destructive to relationships. When repeatedly used in a relationship, this silent treatment will often eventually lead to the opposite of the desired outcome because many people will get tired of repeated manipulation and will pull away. Hence, people who engage in this type of silent treatment often alienate people and sabotage their relationships.

Let’s call it for what it really is; it is bad behavior that inflicts emotional hurt on its recipient. This way some people may never heal and they become permanently scarred. The cycle of hurt would not cease; hurt people, hurt other people. Whole-hearted people value communication and honesty regardless of any situation. Anyone who still uses this approach definitely needs a change in behavioral pattern.

If you have ever been on the receiving end of the silent treatment, how did you deal with it? Share your story let’s talk about it.

Photo Credit: madamenoire.com
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Oluwabusola Adedire is a graduate of Medical and Pharmacological Sciences, an enthusiast on social issues, and loves to inspire people about life, God and Love. She lives permanently in the United Kingdom with her parents and siblings.

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Tags: Olubusola Adedire, silent treatment